Cover the Kids Eyes...

Don't want to scare them ... Here's the latest update picture. I am actually getting a little more of my smile back - okay, very little, but still...

Lorenzo, Carmen, Kay - thanks for all your support and encouraging words. You all know what this journey is like, having traveled this road before me.

This whole facial paralysis thing is really God's way of teaching me patience! Willie says that I didn't need to find such a dramatic way to teach myself this lesson ... but, hey, if you're going to do something, might as well go BIG!

Interesting "factoid" - the facial nerve heals at the rate of about one inch per month! When you look at the structure of this nerve, you start to realize why facial movement comes back so slowly - it's a long little sucker with lots of "arms". This is a case where progress is definitely measured in inches, not feet!

I detected a very small movement at the corner of my mouth over the weekend. It is teeny, tiny, but definitely something is moving. It is probably more in my lower cheek, which would make sense that that section of the nerve is one of the shortest ones. Whatever it is, I'll take it!

Gotta run!

Arrgghh!

I did that just to get everyone's attention - worked, didn't it?

Actually, I am feeling a bit frustrated. I am still really tired even after being off the antibiotics a week now. Rats. I slept 10 hours last night, and could - if I allowed myself - take a nap right now. Instead, though, I am going to see the amazing Jocelyn for a much-needed massage!

I have continuous pain in my neck and shoulder, which is probably a side effect of the facial paralysis. According to Dr. Roland, it would be caused by me holding my head and upper body differently in order to compensate for the lack on sensation on the right side of my face as well as overall compensation for my diminished balance . I am also doing most of my chewing on the left side, which , oddly, strains the right side. Well, I am turning myself over to Jocelyn to see if she can work her magic on me!

Facial progress continues to be slow, slow, slow. I honestly can't see any progress, but I am probably too close (pun intended) to it to see the subtle changes. What I DO see is a ridiculous half-assed smile which I really don't like! Okay, yes, I am whining a bit. I'm entitled to whine every once in awhile.

It's kind of funny - like most people, I was always pretty critical of photos of myself - I'd do that internal dialogue where you say - euw, what a stupid looking smile, oh, your hair looks like crap, oh you've got lines at the corners of your eyes, etc. etc. etc. Welllllll, nothing like having a paralyzed face to make you miss what you had! I have made a promise to God (Allah, Buddha, etc) that if/when I get my face back, I will NOT be critical of how I look!!

Well, these are the idle of thoughts of a woman who is now 8 weeks post brain surgery - guess I should count my blessings that I actually HAVE thoughts.

More later...

PICC-less in New Jersey...

Starring ... Moi!

Yesterday, Willie and I made the trek into NYC (again) to see Dr. Roland. Armed with my usual list of questions, I fired away while Dr. R wrestled the spitting sutures from my head. Interesting to note that said sutures are actually the disolvable kind meaning that my body should have just intergrated them. However, the old noggin decided that it really didn't like the knots in the disolvable suture, so it sent them packing. I am happy to say that the process of getting them out was quite simple - probalby because most of my head is still pretty numb.

While he was working, I mentioned that I had a big old scab still on one part of the incision - he chuckled in that special way of surgeons and said "not anymore!" He apparently yanked it right off. Eeek.

De-suturing accomplished, he asked if I was ready to be de-picced. I must say that, in spite of my fears about this process, it was easy and was over before I even knew it. And, Willie stayed in the room and didn't pass out (although he did say the line was vvveeerrryyy long as it was coming out...) I now have a very small dressing on my arm where the line went it that I have to keep dry for a couple of days, but otherwise I am as good as new! yahoo!

I'll see Dr. R again in a month to check on facial progress. He is optimistic that I may get my blink back by then - let's hope he's right! He said that getting the ability to produce tears will take longer, so I will have to continue drops for quite awhile. That's okay, though - I'm getting pretty used to not really being able to see out of my right eye. (Stay off the roads, people!)

We met Kura for dinner last night after the de-piccing and had a lovely dinner at an Italian wine bar. Towards the end, it got very noisy in the restaurant but otherwise it was really enjoyable. Always great to see Kura! I was, however, completely exhausted by the time dinner was over and it was an effort to walk the 10 blocks or so back to the car. Worth every minute, though!

I'll be seeing Dr. Louie in a couple of weeks for the final release for the infection. Let's hope it is gone for good!

I enjoyed my first Glad Press 'n' Seal - free shower this morning! It was bliss not to have to wrap myself in sticky plastic wrap and hold my right arm up in the air while showering - I feel like a queen! (Oh, how little it takes these days...)

Well, that's the breaking news from NJ...

HiHo Silver!!

I decided this morning to fax a note over to Dr. Louie's office so that he would be up to speed Monday morning when he returns. Apparently, that precipitated a phone call to him from his office staff. Which in turn triggered a flurry of phone calls between various members of the growing medical team.

End up - I am cleared to have the PICC line removed on Monday; and Dr. Roland has graciously agreed to do this when I am in his office Monday afternoon. YAHOO!!!! I will (barring any other changes in the plan) be PICCless by end of day Monday!!!

This all confirms my belief that it is good to be a squeeky wheel - and that we must ALL be actively involved in our medical care!

Lorenzo, go have that chianti now - and have one for me, too!

Kay, have a wonderful weekend with the girlies and Dave!

Not So Fast, Tonto!

Well, I may have cursed myself. The IV company called me with the results of yesterday's blood draw and the C Reactive Protein level is WAY up this week. Since Dr. Louie is out of town, I have sent an email to Dr. Roland to see if he can shed any light on this.

Needless to say, the PICC line is NOT coming out Monday morning - will await all medical opinions and see if I need to go back on this or a different antibiotic.

Not how I wanted to finish the week...

End in Sight

The BIG news of the week --- Dr. Louie called yesterday to say that, barring anything unusual in the blood work from yesterday (which we'll get results from today) I can stop the IV infusions at the end of the day on Friday!!!! Oh happy Day!! It will be SO nice to be able to sleep in Saturday and not have to "hook up" to the lemon.

I am scheduled to have the PICC line taken out Monday morning - the HHC nurse is going to come over early in the morning and take it out. I will be FREE!! I won't know what it is like to shower without wrapping myself up in Glad Press 'n' Seal first!

Now the cautionary note in all of this is that Dr. Louie said that it will be 7 - 10 days before I am "out of the woods" in terms of the infection recurring. So, I'll be keeping fingers and toes crossed AND I'll be extra careful with the incision. Willie will be on "wound inspection detail" every night to check for any changes.

Hopefully next week, as the antibiotics clear my system, I'll feel less fatigued - that's something to look forward to!

Meanwhile, under the category of More Great News - Dad has his annual check up on his eye and the doctor says no change in the tumor, so he is good to go! Mom and Dad are back in Oregon and enjoying the condo life, farmers markets, volks walks and smoothies on the patio.

More later...

Spitting Sutures

...and other competitive events...

First of all, I am posting a picture of my face this week - I still can't consciously move anything, but I do think it continues to look tiny amounts better.

Now, about the suture spitting... Last night I noticed that there were a couple of raised bumps (one kind of black in the center) at the bottom inch or so of my incision. This caused a near panic for me! I calmly asked Willie to take a look, and he verified it - two bumps. So, we immediately took several pictures and emailed them off to Dr. Roland (Yes, Happy Father's Day, Doc!) In fairness, I did suggest that it wasn't urgent and that he shouldn't interrupt his Father's Day.

He emailed me back very early this morning to let me know that I have what is called "spitting sutures". HUH??? Apparently, my body isn't all that happy with the deep sutures and is trying to eject them. Nothing urgent, and Dr. Roland will take them out when I see him next month. Good grief. The surprises never seem to end... At least this one doesn't involve any return trips to NYU!!

Had a good weekend - friend Ellen came up for a visit on Saturday so we did some "girl things" and enjoyed a wonderful meal at Salt in Byram. Willie had a fun weekend of racing, although they did blow the engine about 10 1/2 hours into the 12-hour race, so were unable to finish. Still, the He Men are feeling pretty manly! Lots of chest thumping and other manly stuff.

I am going to go watch for more spitting sutures now...